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How to BE Without Remorse or Apologies

December 8, 2011 By Victor Pride 24 Comments

Advice from friendly friends and family members is not meant to help you succeed. It's meant to help you not break waves and go too far beyond the ordinary.

It isn't their fault, they aren't mean or deceitful, they really are trying to help - but only in the way they can imagine will help.

They can't crawl around in your brain and see your vision, drive, or passion. They can only see their own lack of it.

You should never listen to advice from friendly friends and family. You can hear it but you should never listen. Following their advice is akin to deflating a balloon.

You're doing something out of the ordinary because you don't want to live an ordinary life with a 9-5 job, mortgage, two car lease payments, monthly cell phone plan, and credit card payments.

The friendly friends and family went the normal route, their advice to you is “This is how you go the normal route”.

The real advice, the good advice, isn't pretty, it isn't nice, it's usually the opposite of ‘popular opinion' and it's how 100% of successful men got that way. They didn't follow the baloney rules that friendly friends and family follow. They made their own rules and turned a deaf ear to friendly advice from friendly friends and family.

Friendly friends and family will all give you the same advice independently of each other. You'll say “Yeah, that's what everyone says”. But take a look at their lives. They aren't enviable, they are pitiable and if you take their advice it's exactly where you are headed.

Advice should make you think. It shouldn't make you say “Yeah, I know what I should do….”

The advice that matters should make you say “Wow! I never thought of that! Everyone else says the opposite.”

The Be/But Advice from friendly friends and family:

Be proud but don't be arrogant.

Be money conscious but don't be greedy.

Be courageous but don't be insane.

Be strong but don't be a meat-head.

Be passionate but don't be obsessed.

Be adventurous but don't be crazy.

Be disciplined but don't be strict.

Be smart but don't be a wise-butt.

Work hard but take time to relax.

It's ok if you fail, we'll be here waiting for you with open arms.

The BE advice from BOLD & DETERMINED:

Be Proud.

Be Obsessed.

Be Crazy.

Be Selfish.

Be Strict.

Be after Money.

Be after Freedom.

Be Deaf to Bullshit.

BUT nothing. Here it is and I'm going after it with everything I've got. All the friendly advice in the world isn't worth a dime to me. 

Go after what you want and don't take baloney advice from anyone who hasn't succeeded in doing the exact same thing you are trying to do. You can never fail because you will never give up. Even if you die trying.

Moderation is not the key to success, it's the key to mediocrity. 

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Comments

  1. AvatarRobert H. says

    December 8, 2011 at 9:27 pm

    This post couldn’t have come at a better time, thanks.

    • AvatarVictor Pride says

      December 8, 2011 at 11:18 pm

      Robert,

      The pleasure is mine.

      • AvatarMathew Walker says

        July 6, 2014 at 3:24 pm

        Victory - all out, nothing less.
        I had a mentor teach me that winners take shit, and that the scraps are for those who were willing to stand in line for their turn. After a couple of years of hard work I ran across a strange quote from Abraham Lincoln that actually says “Things may come to those who wait … but only the things left by those who hustle.” which I found while researching additional side businesses I can set up in the local area and have people work for additional income. Not sure what to say other than your ambition is as hard to define in words as the level of respect and appreciation I have for reading them. Extremely motivational!

  2. AvatarRobert H. says

    December 9, 2011 at 4:24 am

    BTW, I just got my new safety razor today. Dude, no way in hell I will ever go back to a shitty disposable. Even the Fusion and Mach 3 holds nothing to this Merkur straight razor, awesome!!! And I deleted my facebook after reading your other post about earning and burning. Keep up the good work on your site, your changing lives bro, I really enjoy your site and make a stop to it at least once/day now. Thanks bro!!

    • AvatarVictor Pride says

      December 10, 2011 at 12:10 pm

      The Merkur Safety Razor is phenomenal. It’s the difference between shaving with a tool and shaving with a toy.

  3. AvatarBenjo James says

    April 16, 2012 at 4:33 pm

    So true. Go to college and get a ‘decent’ job and meet a ‘nice’ girl? Well to be honest, why the FUCK would I ever want that?

    • AvatarSeekay says

      November 26, 2012 at 9:44 am

      Most Parents advice that when they see the kid doesnt know what he wants.
      So they play safe. I understand that now. A lot of men
      are very happy with their regular jobs and married to a nice girl.
      If you dont want that just dont do it. Simple as that. Things are not black or white. If you really know what you want, just
      do it! And if things are not as you expected just change things. Lead your life.

  4. Avatarcourtney says

    May 15, 2012 at 1:51 pm

    Victor,
    Thank you so much for writing these posts! Everyone would be a lot happier if they learned to live life like you do…

  5. AvatarAlvaro says

    August 25, 2012 at 5:52 pm

    Being selfish is a cop-out. That’s not the only, or the best way of being strong. That’s why the World is messed up. And there is a higher level of living than just for the self.

    Everything else is hard to argue against.

  6. AvatarJoe says

    November 28, 2012 at 2:54 pm

    Selfish=Cop Out…..Bullshit….let me tell you something i have been probably the most unselfish person in the world my whole life.I have done and and done and done for other people friends,family,and the women in my life and I have been shit on everytime by all of them.Fuck that shit…be selfish and be happy and if people dont like it fuck them.The rest of my life is going to be about ME!

    • AvatarSam says

      January 22, 2013 at 1:01 pm

      Exactly. Selfishness is the only reason you are alive. Every action you have ever done was for a selfish motive. NOTHING you ever do is strictly for someone else. The meek get shit on it happened to me until 3 years ago when I see things I fucking take them without asking. I never apologize either and I have never felt more congruent.

    • AvatarArun Singh says

      April 17, 2013 at 10:36 pm

      In the morning before dressing, light incense and meditate.

      Retire at a regular hour. Partake of food at regular intervals. Eat with moderation and never to the point of satisfaction.

      Receive a guest with the same attitude you have when alone. When alone, maintain the same attitude you have in receiving guests.

      Watch what you say, and whatever you say, practice it.

      When an opportunity comes do not let it pass by, yet always think twice before acting.

      Do not regret the past. Look to the future.

      Have the fearless attitude of a hero and the loving heart of a child.

      Upon retiring, sleep as if you had entered your last sleep. Upon awakening, leave your bed behind you instantly as if you had cast away a pair of old shoes.

    • AvatarChuck says

      December 7, 2013 at 12:53 am

      Same thing here! I have been raised to be a nice guy … its deep in me! But I have realised that this was my bigness problem in life! Being nice, being generous, being kind! What a fucking plague! Every body see that has a weakness! Everybody shit on you and always try to fuck you! Be selfish, be badass, and then suddenly you have better service everywhere, people don’t even think fucking you, Every things is just better! People might says your a jerk in your back …. but here they are kissing your ass! What you say is true Victor, I have been reading your blog since a while now, and even if some politically correct people would say that your are extreme … what you say is just the cold hard truth! Being selfish … Right on man !

  7. AvatarWrencher says

    November 28, 2012 at 11:41 pm

    Joe

    I smile at that comment. Thanks for the inspiration

  8. AvatarJoe says

    November 29, 2012 at 7:02 pm

    No problem man…..you just get sick of that shit ya know…I just cant do it anymore….

  9. AvatarLars says

    January 5, 2013 at 1:45 am

    Fantastic post Vic! That’s why I’m a personal trainer and have my own business. No bosses, No bullshit. I couldn’t be more satisfied. Cheers.

  10. AvatarSonu says

    March 14, 2013 at 4:34 pm

    Bro… U r amazing… U continue ur good work…. ur con tricks do work…. as they all say” all con men never dies, there smiles just fades away”….. u r helping everyone man…. Keep updating ur articles… i have read all… i would like to see more….

  11. AvatarElijah Koberle says

    March 18, 2013 at 1:27 am

    This is pure testosterone speaking, this shit drives deep, I love reading these articles because they are so fucking real-they say fuck the modern world and its garbage advertised life, they say get hungry, be mean, and take what you fucking want… man im fired up!

  12. AvatarEric S. Mueller says

    March 26, 2013 at 6:29 pm

    Great words. Earl Nightengale qouted somebody else saying “The opposite of courage is not cowardice. It’s conformity”. You can never do anything great when you aim to be just like everybody else.

  13. Avatarmatty says

    April 14, 2013 at 4:34 am

    hey thank for this much for this i been listing far to much to other ppl this has relli helped me a lot :D

  14. AvatarPhil Janecic says

    August 16, 2014 at 11:24 pm

    I totally agree. That’s why I wrote about how the worst advice in the world is “just be yourself”. There’s no “you” - you are always changing.

    You can be a skinny wimp one day and turn into a powerful badass the next. But if you “accept” the wimp version of yourself, you’ll never improve.

  15. Avatarefe says

    February 11, 2015 at 2:11 am

    Hey,

    This blog is great and your every post is an art piece. You are very very smart man Victor. You are not lucky. You just smart which 90 percent of men dont :)

  16. AvatarSteven says

    May 11, 2017 at 3:21 am

    Love these rules, they are really cutting through the bullshit of everyday people and their “work-tv-sleep” routine!

    Grts from Belgium

  17. AvatarAlex says

    July 16, 2019 at 11:51 am

    Vic, it is time to publish an aggressive, down to earth, and highly motivational article like this one in 2019. All the sissies and mommy boys need to be slap in their faces and only my man Victor Pride knows how to do it smartly.
    Greetings from LA, California.

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